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<pre><font face="Arial" color="#FF0000" size="6">Technology Terms</font></pre>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>404 Someone who�s clueless, from the World Wide Web error message, �404
Not Found,� meaning that the requested document could not be located, as
in, �Don�t bother asking him... he�s 404, man.�</p>
<p>ADMINISPHERE The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank
and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly
inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>ALPHA GEEK The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office
or work group.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>ASSMOSIS The process by which some people seem to absorb success and
advancement by kissing up the boss.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>BLAMESTORMING Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed
or a project failed and who was responsible.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>CHAINSAW CONSULTANT An outside expert brought in the reduce the employee
headcount, leaving the boss with clean hands.</p>
<p>CHIPS AND SALSA Hardware and software, as in, �First we gotta figure out
if the problem�s in your chips or your salsa.�</p>
<p>CLM Career limiting move, used among microserfs to describe ill-advised
activity. Trashing your boss within earshot is a serious CLM.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>CUBE FARM An office filled with cubicles.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>DEINSTALLED Fired.</p>
<p>DILBERTED To be exploited and oppressed by your boss, derived from the
experiences of Dilbert, the geek-in-hell comic strip character. �I�ve been
dilberted again. The old man revised the specs for the fourth time this
week.�</p>
<p>FLIGHT RISK Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave
the company or department soon.</p>
<p>G.O.O.D. JOB A �Get-Out-Of-Debt� job that pays a lot of money but
which a person will quit when solvent again.</p>
<p>GENERICA Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same no
matter where one is, such as fast food joints, strip malls, subdivisions, as in,
�We were so lost in generica that I forgot what city we were in.�</p>
<p>IDEA HAMSTERS People who always seem to have their idea generators running.</p>
<p>IRRITAINMENT Media spectacles that are annoying but which you can�t stop
watching, such as the O.J. trial.</p>
<p>MOUSE POTATO The on-line wired generation�s answer to the couch potato.</p>
<p>OHNO-SECOND That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you�ve
just made a big mistake.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic
device to get it to work again.</p>
<p>PRAIRIE DOGGING When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm,
and people�s heads pop up over the walls to see what�s going on.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>SALMON DAY The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream, only
to get screwed and die in the end.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>SEAGULL PARTNER A partner who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on
everything, and then leaves.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>SITCOMS What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops
working to stay home with the kids. Stands for Single Income, Two (or Three)
Children, Oppressive Mortgage.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>SQUIRT THE BIRD Transmit a signal to a satellite.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>STARTER MARRIAGE A short-lived first marriage that ends in divorce with no
kids, no property, and no regrets.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>STRESS PUPPY A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out.</p>
<p><font face="Arial" size="3"><b>SWIPED OUT An ATM or credit card that has become useless from too much use.</p>
<p>TOURISTS People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their
jobs, as in, �We had three serious students in the class but the rest were
tourists.�</p>
<p>TREEWARE Documentation or other printed material.</p>
<p>UMFRIEND A sexual relation of dubious standing or a concealed intimate
relationship, as in, �This is my, um, friend.�</p>
<p>VULCAN NERVE PINCH The taxing hand position required for certain hot-key
combinations.</p>
<p>XEROX SUBSIDY Swiping free photocopies from one�s workplace.</p>
<p>YUPPIE FOOD STAMPS Twenty-dollar bills, especially from ATM�s. Often used
when trying to split the bill after a meal, as in, �We owe eleven bucks
each, but all anybody�s got are yuppie food stamps.�</p>
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