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<h3 class="title"><a name="top"></a>"The Funeral Director/The Person"
Kurt J. Mangsen, President & CEO, Nordgren Memorial Chapel</h3>
<h4 class="titlesmall">Update-June 24, 2005</h4>
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<p>Preface: Before I present the Subject of this Update, I want to acknowledge
and thank the many individuals, organizations, and associations for their
comments regarding the FUNERAL MONITOR (as a result of the information presented
in our June 16, 2005 Update) and the less than accurate reporting and lack
of professionalism on behalf of THE FUNERAL MONITOR. It is not the intent
of this web site to single out any individual or entity or to initiate a
crusade against anyone. I, therefore, will not incorporate any of the comments,
statements, or materials submitted to us in order to further discredit the
Funeral Monitor. It is apparent the Funeral Monitor has done a good job
at this on their own.</p>
<p>The sole purpose of this web site is to set the record straight with the
facts and to create a forum that puts ALL “would be” Character
Assassins on notice that they will be identified, rooted out, and held accountable
for their actions now and in the future.</p>
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<h4 class="titlesmall">“The Funeral Director / The Person”<br>
Kurt J. Mangsen, President, Nordgren Memorial Chapel</h4>
<p>On November 19, 2003 <strong>Kurt J. Mangsen, President and CEO, Nordgren
Memorial Chapel</strong> signed a letter of termination of my employment
at Nordgren Memorial after more than nine years of dedicated and faithful
service to him and the Nordgren name that he claims is so important to
him. Kurt was ONLY man enough to have a constable, William George, a friend
and fellow brother in the Masonic fraternity, served me with the letter
of termination – totally without notice.</p>
<p>In order to understand the full impact of his action (and, quite frankly,
it was not his action, but that of others which we will get to in a future
Update), I shall present a historical perspective of my involvement with
Nordgren Memorial Chapel dating back to 1961 and continuing to the infamous
day of November 19, 2003.<br>
For one to truly understand this irrational action, one must have the history
of the association between Kurt Mangsen and me. What I am about to present
will be 100% accurate; 100% factual, and supported by documentation in my
possession.</p>
<p>In the spring of 1961 at the age of 16, I walked into Nordgren Memorial
Chapel, 300 Lincoln Street, Worcester, Massachusetts and indicated to the
man that greeted me that I was looking for a summer job and thought, at
that point, that I was considering a career in the funeral business. I was
invited in and spoke to another man at the same time – later I learned
the man that greeted me at the door was Arthur “Rudy” Nordgren
and the other man was his brother, Carl Nordgren. After about a half hour
of questioning, I left with a summer job at the funeral home.</p>
<p>For the summers of 1961 and 1962 I worked at Nordgren Memorial Chapel doing
everything from removals, calling hours, assisting with funerals, and lots
of grounds maintenance. After graduating from American International College
in Springfield, I attended and graduated from the New England Institute
of Anatomy, Sanitary Science, Embalming, and Funeral Directing in Boston’s
Kenmore Square in 1967.</p>
<p>In 1981 I approached Harry Mangsen, Kurt Mangsen’s dad, and Jack
Carrigan, concerning a potential business association at Nordgren Memorial
Chapel. I was informed that they wanted to bring me on board, but were in
the process of acquiring the funeral home and could not enter into an association
at that time. After affiliating with Caswell-King Funeral Home from 1981
to 1993, I joined Nordgren Memorial Chapel in 1994. At that point, I was
introduced to Kurt Mangsen for the very first time.</p>
<p>I found Kurt Mangsen to be a genuine young man; by genuine, I mean –
sincere and caring. He was, and in many respects still is, extremely shy,
lacking confidence, lacking people skills, and pretty much kept in the back
room as has been stated in correspondence and complaints filed by Kurt’s
wife, Katherine Mangsen (Katherine Mangsen will be subject of another Update
in the near future).</p>
<p>I had developed a special, yet entirely different, relationship with both
Harry Mangsen and Jack Carrigan. They were as different as day and night,
and for those that knew Harry & Jack (both now deceased) I am not talking
out of court as you know. Back in the 1960’s I was the “butt”
of the majority of the jokes that came from Harry & Jack, but even as
young as I was, I held my own and commanded the respect of both these men.
As such, in 1994 both Harry and Jack opened up to me with the frustrations
they had with each other and their sons, Steve Carrigan & Kurt Mangsen.</p>
<p>It is not my intent to “air dirty laundry”, and I will not.
Suffice it to say, there was little (actually, no) love lost between the
Mangsen’s and the Carrigan’s. Part of the discontent the Carrigan’s
harbored was that Kurt, who is an absolutely phenomenal embalmer, had not,
would not, and did not ever arrange a funeral with a family. He truly was
relegated to the “back room.”</p>
<p>Kurt Mangsen was sheltered (but not necessarily protected) by his father,
Harry from the dissatisfaction that was routinely expressed by the Carrigan’s.
Kurt had been treated for the illness, dyslexia, for years (told to me by
Harry Mangsen), and Harry did not feel Kurt was capable of dealing with
a family at their time of loss. I suggested to Harry that he was wrong and
that I believed Kurt to have the potential, lacking only the education and
confidence to get the job done. Harry asked me to work with Kurt.</p>
<p>I took Kurt under my wing and spent a great deal of time nurturing the
issue of confidence. For years Kurt had been put down by everyone around
him to include both Jack & Steve Carrigan and even to a lesser extent,
his dad and mother, Pauline Mangsen - reinforcing that he was not capable
of doing things that others did routinely. In most cases Kurt’s mom
and dad thought they were protecting him; when in actuality, they were hindering
any potential to improve and help Kurt gain confidence.</p>
<p>From mid 1995 on Kurt and I became very close, so much so that I would
see Kurt almost every day, but definitely speak with him daily. When Kurt
was informed his dad, Harry, had a brain tumor, Kurt regressed back “into
the shell” wherein he was when I joined Nordgren’s in 1994.
It was an extremely difficult time for Kurt, as you can well imagine, and
I was sensitive to his feelings and was there for him each day. We would
talk. We would go for rides. Up to now, I considered Kurt to be my little
brother.</p>
<p>As Harry Mangsen’s time on earth was coming to an end, he asked Kurt
to bring me to see him at his condo on Lake Quinsigamond, at which time
he wanted to take one last ride on his boat on the lake. Kurt drove the
boat up front while Harry and I spoke in the rear of the boat. We spoke
about the business a bit, about Harry’s time being short, and about
what was to happen. Harry Mangsen reached out, took my hand in his, and
asked me to please help Kurt, to teach him what I knew so that someday he,
too, could meet with families, and to protect him from the Carrigan’s
and from himself. At this point we were both crying. I gave Harry my word
I would educate Kurt. I would protect him. And I would see to it that whatever
happened, Kurt would have a job and position in life.</p>
<p>My role as a big brother was now changed and I became Kurt’s surrogate
father – at least until Kurt got to the point where he could assume
for himself an independent role. Needless to say, Kurt was overwhelmed by
the circumstances wherein he now found himself, but he was willing to learn
and accepted that the fact he would now had to assume a more hands on position
in the business once his dad passed.</p>
<p>Harry Mangsen died soon thereafter.</p>
<p>I immediately began spending a great deal of time with Kurt counseling
him on how I dealt with families that were about to or who had actually
experienced a loss of a loved one – much like he had just experienced.
Almost immediately, I could see that the experience of losing his father,
Harry, had opened up an opportunity for Kurt to see another side of the
funeral business – that until now- had been alien to him. I capitalized
on Harry’s death and used that as the opening “to bring Kurt
to the table for the first time.” It worked. Kurt joined me when I
made arrangements with families. I introduced him to all my families, to
the clergy, and the Orthodox Community as my protégé and confidant.</p>
<p>When I wasn’t at the funeral home, the Carrigan’s from time
to time would criticize Kurt to his face and Kurt would retreat to his home
without notice or without telling anyone. I would be told of this by Betty
Sander, Secretary/Bookkeeper or Jimmy O’Connor, an employee at Nordgren’s,
and I would immediately call or visit Kurt at home to determine what happened.
I was routinely criticized for protecting and making excuses for Kurt by
the Carrigan’s; but that didn’t matter – for I had given
my word to Harry Mangsen that I would protect Kurt.</p>
<p>The pressure was now getting to Kurt and it was obvious to Katherine, Kurt’s
wife and to Pauline, Kurt’s mom. At first I was unaware that Pauline
Mangsen was privy to my conversations, commitment, and promises to Harry
to educate and protect Kurt. Unbeknownst to Kurt (or anyone for that matter),
Pauline (Kurt’s mom) asked me to come to her condo at Briarwood late
one afternoon. Pauline was deeply concerned for Kurt’s health. She
thought Kurt might be having a breakdown of sorts, and she feared for his
safety. I, too, was having some of the same concerns as I know Katherine
was as well. I indicated to Pauline, I would get to the bottom of this.</p>
<p>At this point Kurt strongly believed Stephen Carrigan was stealing money
from the funeral home. He engaged the services of Atty. Scott Sinrich and
the services of Johanna Higham, C.P.A. to analyze the books. Ms. Higham
indicated there were discrepancies that were suspicious and that she too
believed monies were being pilfered from the funeral home. I was asked to
attend a meeting at the law offices of Attorney Sinrich. It was decided
to call for an emergency Board Meeting at which time Stephen Carrigan would
be suspended, and I would be appointed to the Board. I agreed to participate
ONLY after being convinced by Ms. Higham that Stephen Carrigan was from
all indications guilty of embezzling monies from the funeral home. Before
agreeing to any participation on my behalf, I insisted Stephen Carrigan,
if suspended, be suspended WITH PAY and not without pay as proposed by Kurt
& Katherine Mangsen. After much discussion, the Mangsen’s agreed
to the WITH PAY suspension.</p>
<p>From that point forward litigation after litigation ensued between the
Mangsen’s & the Carrigan’s, and I was thrust in the middle.
I was harassed by the Carrigan’s attorney; threatened with law suit
after law suit, and belittled because of my association with Kurt and Katherine
Mangsen. During all of this mess, I was called in and a party to conversations
and asked for my opinions on many matters. At no time was I in a position
to make a decision on behalf of the Mangsen’s or Nordgren Memorial
Chapel.</p>
<p>As this process was unfolding, my wife Carolyn and I were asked to be God
Parents to Kurt and Katherine’s son Derek, an honor we accepted and
did not accept lightly. Kurt and Katherine Mangsen considered us family
as we did them, for I had been there for Kurt for so many years at personal
sacrifice to my own family – but Kurt was worth it.</p>
<p>Soon thereafter, Kurt & Katherine asked that I come by their home so
that we could discuss the future of the business – that Kurt could
no longer stand being associated with the Carrigan’s. I agreed to
come by to discuss the issue, but that there must be no interruptions and
that the children had to be elsewhere. We decided to meet at the home of
Katherine’s mother, Mrs. Johnson, next door to the Mangsen’s.
I brought with me flip charts at which time we analyzed all options available
to Kurt. After three (3) hours, Kurt decided he wanted to either buy out
the Carrigan’s or have them buy out his interest in Nordgren Memorial
Chapel.</p>
<p>I had no interest in Kurt’s decision process other than to make it
perfectly clear that if he were to purchase the Carrigan’s interest
in the funeral home, he had better be prepared to go to work for a living
and no more coming into the office when he felt like it or disappearing
whenever something wasn’t to his liking. He indicated he understood.</p>
<p>As the issue of monies being misappropriated (supposedly by Stephen Carrigan,
which by the way was never proven), the option was put on the table for
either the Mangsen’s or Carrigan’s to buy the others interest
in the funeral home or the funeral home would be put up for sale. Both parties
wanted the funeral home, and the sentimentality Kurt had for the family
name was too much for him to allow the Carrigan’s to have the funeral
home. Although Kurt wanted the funeral home at most any cost, he wanted
no part of the negotiations, no part of the meetings, and no personal involvement
in the process. I was asked to assume this role along with Katherine Mangsen
and Atty Sinrich, and together we labored through the very tedious and complex
purchase of the funeral home, while Kurt sat back and kept asking, “when
is it going to be over?”</p>
<p>During the funding process, I was asked by Kurt & Katherine Mangsen
if I would be willing to invest $50,000 in the transaction for a percentage
of the business. Prior to this request, I had no interest in owning or investing
in the transaction. After learning who else was investing in the transaction,
my wife and I agreed to invest the monies to make the transaction happen,
and we refinanced our home in order to come up with the $50,000. The negotiations
for the value $50K were made between me and Ms. Higham, Nordgren’s
new accountant and agreed to by Kurt & Katherine Mangsen.</p>
<p>Now comes Katherine Mangsen into the everyday activities at Nordgren Memorial
Chapel. Along with Katherine comes Gail Wiles, a friend of Katherine’s
who assumes the responsibilities of receptionist/bookkeeper and things begin
to change. Long standing associates and staff were being terminated without
discussions or participation by All owners. When I approached Kurt about
several pertinent issues regarding actions Katherine was initiating, his
response was “I have to wait until the time is right to talk to her
and then say, honey, you have to trust me on this one.” I indicated
to Kurt that waiting for the right time would be too late to rectify the
actions that would have taken place. Kurt’s response was, “I
have no other choice.”</p>
<p>The wedge had now been driven between Kurt and me by Katherine and supported
to extremes by Gail Wiles, as I will address in future updates.</p>
<p><strong>Kurt Mangsen is a gentle man. Kurt has been incorrectly labeled
as incompetent by his associates in the funeral business as well as by
members of his own family. His gentleness has been taken to be a weakness
instead of a very valuable asset. His confidence has been demonstrated
in his actions and willingness to learn – in essence after the passing
of his dad. Kurt has been held back in the past by the feelings he had
about himself as he listened to others talk about him. To this day, it
is my sincere belief that what separates Kurt from reality is his lack
of truthfulness with his wife, Katherine, and most importantly, with himself.
Few know Kurt as well as I do. Kurt is aware of the truth in ALL instances;
yet when he feels threatened, he runs from the truth as he always has.
Years of hard work and progress can be thrown away in one moment when
one denies what they know to be the truth.Living a life of lies –
must be so very difficult! I have and will continue to have a great deal
of respect for Kurt Mangsen, and I and my family, wish him the peace that
only honesty with oneself can achieve.</strong></p>
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<p><strong>The next update scheduled for July 5, 2005 will feature -<br>
“Kevin Mercadante” - “The Truth Behind The Funeral Director,<br>
The Man, & His Modus - Operandi”</strong></p>
<p><strong>Don’t Miss this Update!</strong></p>
<p>Philip G. Haddad, Jr. </p>
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