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<td width="699"><p><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:14pt;"><b>September
2005</b></span></font></p>
<p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e931"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
1
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
2<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:18
PM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e931"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Jane
came for a visit, which makes me very happy. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">We
spent most of the evening surfing news channels. I was
pleasantly surprised by Joe Scarborough who I usually
don't enjoy. He was talking about the people who couldn't
afford to leave. He mention some people asking banks
for a loan of twenty dollars for a tank of gas and being
turned down. I might have thought he would be one of
the people blaming the people that "chose to stay"
and I'm happy to be wrong. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">More
than one news person spoke about how much need there
is and how weird it seems that it's taking so long for
help to arrive. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">This
morning we got hooked back in. Jane was going to go
out for a skate but she couldn't break away. She just
left. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
just watched some film of people yelling help, help,
help, help. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I've
been trying to write a post since 7:30 AM. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1431)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1431"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1129" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1129"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1129"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e932"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
2
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
3<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:55
PM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e932"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
know that there are humanitarian disasters every day.
Big ones in which whole populations are targeted and
smaller ones in which the elder down the street doesn't
have care. I know it isn't good to get sucked into the
media coverage of any given event, switching from one
cable news station to another, the radio on, eyes glued
to the computer. But I can't think about anything else
right now. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Yesterday
I went swimming and then Jane and I went to <a href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/listings/restaurants/venue?vid=181480">dinner</a>.
We came home and turned the news back on. After a few
minutes I went to bed with a book but I couldn't concentrate.
</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">There
is so much I want to say and it seems like other people
say it better and sometimes it feels like it's better
to be quiet. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I'm
grateful that Jane has been here. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1432)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1432"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1130" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1130"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1130"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e933"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
6
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
11<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:14
AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e933"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
have this metaphor about how racism is taught. In some
families mom and dad wear white robes and the racism
is out loud. In many families it's more subtle. When
you walk past people of color mom, or dad, holds your
hand a little tighter. No one has to say anything. Nothing
is out loud but a lesson is learned.</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I've
been thinking about it all week while I watch crowds
of people of color calling for help and listened while
people debated if race were part of the reason. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">And
they were poor. And they were elderly. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">From
time to time a famous person will mention that they
get so much free stuff now that they are famous and
can afford to buy what they need. I've been thinking
about that too. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">What
is human nature and what is learned? We ask that question
again and again. What we do know is that we need systems
to protect us from the worst of who can be. And the
systems either weren't in place or weren't employed.
Or this event shows us that the systems in which we
live are filled with bias. I imagine most of the people in those
crowds are used to governmental slowness to respond.
</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<table align="center" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;" border="0" width="289">
<tr>
<td width="283">
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font color="#800000" face="Lucida Sans"><font color="#000000"><span style="font-size:9pt;">There
is no purpose for government except to improve the lives of its
citizens. Yet as scenes of horror that seemed to be coming from some
Third World country flashed before us, </span><strong><span style="font-size:9pt;">official Washington was
like a dog watching television. It saw the lights and images, but did
not seem to comprehend their meaning or see any link to reality.</span></strong></font></font><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:9pt;">
<a href="http://www.crooksandliars.com/2005/09/04.html#a4787">
Link</a></span></font></td>
</tr>
</table>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I've
been encouraged by the way the main stream media have
broken out of their lockstep and continue to criticize.
With the exception of the deletion of <a href="http://www.crooksandliars.com/2005/09/02.html#a4762">Kanye
West's comment</a> there seems to have been some very
forth right coverage. By Saturday night there were these
little organized films of time lines. The event was
already in reruns. I turned it off. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">As
things move from urgent crisis to recovery the conversation
shifts to what is (finally) being done. That's all to
the good I suppose. But I can't forget those people
yelling - help, help, help. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">During
the first few days I watched all the news channels,
including Fox. But that's over. Last night <a href="http://www.billoreilly.com/show;jsessionid=114486D9EF900E48F43D13513D24F39E?action=viewTVShow&showID=439#1">O'Reilly</a>
said:</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<table align="center" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;" border="0" width="311">
<tr>
<td width="305">
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:9pt;">The aftermath of Hurricane Katrina should be taught in every American
school - if you don't get educated, if you don't develop a skill,
you'll most likely to be poor. And sooner or later you'll be standing
on a symbolic rooftop waiting for help. Chances are that help will not
be quick in coming.</span></font>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">That's
the lesson? </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1433)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1433"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1131" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1131"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1131"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e934"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
7
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
2<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:32
PM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e934"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">There
were four years in a row in my life when someone died.
My grandparents and two aunts. I lived with my grandparents
and I was close to both aunts so the deaths hit me.
I remember walking around my high school feeling stunned.
I remember looking at people who were laughing and wondering
how it was possible that they could just go on with
life and not notice that someone was gone. And at the
funerals I was uncomfortable when people were happy
to see one another. I thought we should all be dour.
</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">That
was a long time ago. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Dean
was visiting on 9/11. He was old enough to know what
was going on but I didn't think he should be steeped
in it. The minute he left for his internship I would
turn on the radio and the TV and hunch in front of the
computer. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Deb
and I took him to <a href="http://www.sfzc.com/ggfindex.htm">Green
Gulch</a> for a tour of the gardens. I had one of those
moments again. There we were in this place of wonder
and beauty. Calm. Fed. With one another. And there was
all this horror in other parts of the world. How was
it possible?</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Having
Jane here balanced my obsessive news watching. And when
she left I made an effort to moderate my consumption.
The schedule at the pool is changing and things aren't
clear. I didn't get as many swims in last week as I
might have wished for. This week I've been swimming
twice. Swimming makes me feel strong and clear. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">And
yet, I am distracted. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Two
words you do want to say to me. Blame game. (<a href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/redzenradish/">As
Kristina wrote)</a> This isn't about blame. It's about
accountability. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Marie
is <a href="http://blueridgeblog.blogs.com/blue_ridge_blog/2005/09/overview.html">hosting
a family</a>. Bobbi is selling some of her <a href="http://www.cobaltika.com/gallery/nolaHelp.html">NOLA
shots</a> to raise funds for Habitat. The world is full
of wonder. And beauty. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">And
sorrow. And loss. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1434)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1434"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1132" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1132"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1132"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e935"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
8
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
4<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:41
PM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e935"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Maybe
one of the reasons the news has been so compelling
is that it was more raw, less produced. Time and time
again I saw news people lose their cool. They questioned
what was happening. It was like having a free press.
</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Things
are settling down now. <a href="http://www.mediainfo.com/eandp/news/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1001055768">Fema
has said they don't want pictures of the bodies taken</a>
and there are reports that news people are less and
less welcome in the disaster area. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
read a <a href="http://thispublicaddress.com/tPA4/archives/2005/09/spectacle.php">post
by Jeff</a> several times because it said something
so well.</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<table align="center" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;" border="0" width="299">
<tr>
<td width="293">
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:9pt;">It�s hard to turn off the specular stream on TV. It was almost a week
before I heard a single �historical recap� of the events because the
events were happening so fast. CNN looped twenty-second clips over and
over, but these clips had little staying power. Unlike the collapse of
the WTC with its signature plumes of smoke, or the toppling of statues
in Iraq, there were no singular images that could approach the impact
of Katrina. This disaster lacks any real unity of image, and perhaps
highlights the artificial nature of these manufactured �signature
images.� It seems as if the public has been slapped with an actuality
beyond image that defies any general sense of truth. It�s not a
spectacle; it is truly a disaster.</span></font></td>
</tr>
</table>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">For
me the image of a large group of people calling out
for help will always be with me as a memory of this
event but I agree that even that image doesn't contain
the disaster. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"><a href="http://thispublicaddress.com/tPA4/archives/2005/09/disgrace_signs_3.php">Yesterday
Jeff wrote</a> about <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Harvey_Jackson">the
debate</a> over whether <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harvey_Jackson">Hardy
Jackson</a> should remain in the Wikipedia. I remembered
that <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/redzenradish/84235.html?mode=reply">Kristina
had posted his picture</a> and I remembered seeing him
on the news. There have been so many people since then
that I almost didn't remember him. I would vote to keep
him because any individual story makes it all more real.
But it is hard to even use the word real when talking
about images on a screen. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">As
the days pass the image makers sort and sift looking
for the ones that serve the rhetoric. I've seen plenty
of flags. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The
idea that Fema wants to protect the dignity of the dead
by not allowing the photographs seems completely disingenuous.
The administration must be shocked to realize that the
media that has served them so well actually questioned
them. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1435)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1435"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1133" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1133"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1133"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e936"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
9
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
1:39<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
PM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e936"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">If
money were no object I would have subscriptions to way
too many magazines. This might sound like the beginning
of a post in which I wish I had more money but it's
just the opposite. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Despite
the fact that I am slowly having to let go of subscriptions
I still have two stacks to work through. Last night
I was doing just that and thinking that if I had more
I'd be overwhelmed. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">One
of the most tempting pieces of mail I get is a really
low price on The New Yorker. There were four months
of back issues when I canceled my last subscription.
</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
love reading but I'm a slow reader. And I reread a lot.
And I like to save things I've read. I have years worth
of some magazines none of which I want to let go off.
</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">When
I had a rock-n-roll band I read Rollingstone and Spin
and Vanity Fair and Vogue. When I was cooking professionally
I read Gourmet and Sunset and Cooks Illustrated. A friend
got me a subscription to Metropolitan Home after I confessed
a secret enjoyment of it. I've had subscriptions to
MS on and off since it began. I got The Nation for awhile.
</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
will always love The Sun. I like Bitch and Harpers.
I love Saveur. And Poets and Writers. I've had subscriptions
to National Geographic a few times </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
used to read news papers more than I do. I read them
on line now but I still like the feel of the paper spread
out on a table. I like literary journals. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">And
books. Of course. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">But
I get over whelmed. So right now I have just the right
amount. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">It's
a silly thing to write about but I had to turn off the
TV last night. I read a great interview in an old Bitch
with <a href="http://www.tworock.org/Carol%20Lee%20Flinders.htm">Carol
Lee Flinders.</a> </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The
TV is back on. CNN. There's a photo montage of rescues
with sappy background music. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Sigh.
</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1436)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1436"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1134" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1134"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1134"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e937"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
10
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
10:45<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e937"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">It
doesn't seem like I can get through a day and not <a href="http://money.cnn.com/2005/09/08/news/economy/katrina_wages.reut/">be
angry</a>. (via <a href="http://www.bopnews.com/archives/004843.html">The
Blogging of a President</a> via <a href="http://www.ncf.carleton.ca/~ek867/wood_s_lot.html">Wood_s
Lot</a>) </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
watched <a href="http://www.netflix.com/MovieDisplay?movieid=60037627&trkid=90529">The
Manchurian Candidate</a> last night. I'd only recently
seen <a href="http://www.netflix.com/MovieDisplay?movieid=737957&trkid=181026">the
original</a>. I liked it. And it was chilling. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
have already been to the pool this morning so I'm pretty
mellow.</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1437)</script> <noscript></span></font></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1437"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1135" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1135"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1135"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e938"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
14
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
1:17<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
PM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e938"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
spent a lot of time with <a href="http://www.som.org/8interfaith/orr.htm">Leonard Orr</a>.
To be fair, what I learned from him made a huge difference
in how I experienced myself in the world. In a good
way. And. Let's just say, I have some issues.</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">But
I was thinking about Leonard today. Once we were in
SF and I bought some kind of OM button, or maybe it
was a picture of the George Washington on the dollar,
or something that I knew he'd think was cool. So I was
showing it to him and he asked if I'd bought more than
one. It took me a awhile to figure out that he would
have bought more than one and sold them. The same thing
happened in India. He offered to give me some money
to buy some shawls. I got that he was thinking I'd buy
them and then sell them. I know I'd give them as gifts
so I didn't take him up on the offer. And once he brought
me a box of mugs with the rebirthing symbol on them.
I didn't understand that he was giving them to me. I
thought he was giving them to the rebirthing center.
He was always encouraging entrepreneurship. I was always
failing. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">When
I did own a little business I continued with my bad
habits. I did make money but not as much as I might
have. I worked way too hard for way to little. For me
the cafe was part of creating community at my little
college and was heart broken by much of the experience.
</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I've
been wracking my brain for what I can do since I don't
seem to be able to find a job. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
had a really nice Saturday with Sonya. She took me for
<a href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/listings/restaurants/venue?vid=182044">lunch
</a>and a walk on <a href="http://www.sfgate.com/traveler/guide/eastbay/neighborhoods/piedmont.shtml">Piedmont
Ave.</a> We passed two women making music for tips.
One was playing a <a href="http://www.cr.nps.gov/museum/exhibits/revwar/image_gal/vafoimg/vafo1327.html">mouth
harp</a> and the other was singing. Sonya, sweetheart
that she is, gave them both some money. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The
obvious thing for me to do is cook. I guess. Oh. I dunno.
I'm just trying to come up with something. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1438)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1438"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1135" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1135"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1135"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e938"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
15
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
11:54<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
AM</font></font></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e938"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
had a truly stupid moment last night while watching
<a href="http://www.netflix.com/MovieDisplay?movieid=60022680">Beijing
Bicycle.</a> I was listening to the Chinese and reading
the English subtitles and I thought - gee, that doesn't
sound anything like how it's spelled. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">It's
good to be double Gemini at moments like that. A whole
other part of yourself can make wise cracks about wondering
if they have hooked on phonics for Chinese. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The
movie has everything I like in a movie. Complex characters.
Atmospheric moments. And it doesn't have a trite happy
ending. It has an ending that you can talk about and
wonder about and have your own opinion about what might
happen next. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">And
yet, last night I kinda wanted a happy ending. I wanted
the story of how it all works out. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1439)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1439"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1136" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1136"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1136"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e938"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
16
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
12:47<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
PM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e938"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">On
Fridays a group of Autistic kids swim in the shallow
end of the pool in which I swim. There's is a rope and
buoy line between us. Some of them run and jump and
splash. The life guards yell. Not in a mean way. One
young man likes to hang on the ropes. I think it believes
that he will be able to sneak to the other side. He
gets such a big smile. Last week he did get over
before someone noticed. Another likes to run up and
down the few stairs and then race to the side and jump
in. He usually gets this done once before anyone stops
him. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
love sedition. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1440)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1440"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1137" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1137"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1137"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e939"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
20
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
12:16<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
PM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e939"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">If
I don't post for a few days I start getting asked why.
Which is sweet. I used to write out my fears and problems
on the blog but I don't feel safe doing that right now.
I'll get over that. I know that reading other people's
writing about their problems opens my heart and moves
me and is an important part of my reading life. I also
know that this is a public space and if I'm going to
write something I may get shoved. And I have. And oh
well. It is what it is. But it has made me feel cautious
about writing when I'm down. And I have been down. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">My
life is not bad. I have amazing friends who help me
again and again. I swim. I have books to read and movies
to watch and yarn to knit. So. It isn't exactly all
good but I am always mindful of the blessings in my
life. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
don't have enough of any one yarn to work on a project
and I don't really know what I'm doing. I've been knitting
all the different yarns into a blanket of squares but
I don't really know how to attach them or adjust for
difference of gage so it's misshapen and odd looking.
I love it. And I'm crocheting little granny squares
with the smaller pieces of yarn. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
watched <a href="http://www.netflix.com/MovieDisplay?movieid=60025018&trkid=90529">The
Way Home.</a> It was quite dear.</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">And
so it goes. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">When
I was younger writing came easier. I carried around
thin gray notebooks in which I wrote spastically at
any given moment. In school I had to write in response
to a teacher. Even in the MFA program. I built up some
muscle tone in terms of being able to write in different
ways. But the blog has always been my writing refuge.
The place where I just write. The surprise of blogging
has been all the great people I've met. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">But
you know. <a href="http://www.jmdl.com/lyrics/song.cfm?id=ShadowsAndLight">Every
picture has it's shadows and it has some source of light.</a></span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I've
been flat. I can barely keep up my end of a conversation.
</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">And.
So. Now I'm trying to...oh. I dunno. Keep on keeping
on. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1441)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1441"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1138" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1138"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1138"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"> </span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e940"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
21
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
9:01<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
AM</font></font></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e940"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">In
my dream I was on a cruise and a friend needed me to
wrote a simple sentence that held two ideas. The sentence
I wrote was:</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The
Mayor's antipathy for geese was exacerbated when Lady
Cornwell purchased some for the lake. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1442)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1442"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1139" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1139"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1139"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e941"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
26
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
11:39<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e941"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
have always compared my Sims playing to the way I used
to play with dolls. I tell my self stories while I play.
In the Sims 2 the story telling is more controlled by
the game. The addition of aspirations for a Sim guides
many of the choices you make. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
was playing with two of my dorms. One is full
of men and the other women. Some of them were sweethearts
in high school but I mixed them up so they could make
new friends. A Sim can have a handheld game now
and they can play with another Sims if that Sim has
a game. If they play too long they get a crush on the
Sim. The first time I saw that I laughed. It was two
sort of macho guys and they were playing with their
handhelds and - poof - they had a crush. I thought it
was cute. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">In
my girl dorm, two Sims played handhelds together (sounds
so licentious, doesn't it?) and they got a crush. Back
in the boy dorm their boy friends wanted woohoo, which
is what the kids are calling <i><b>it</b></i> these
days in the Sims. You can fulfill an aspiration in another
house so I went over to the girl dorm to make it happen.
I forgot about the crush. One of the girls, Tillie (named
after <a href="http://mockingbird.creighton.edu/NCW/olsen.htm">Tillie
Olsen</a> by her two lesbian mothers) wanted to have
a party. When they have a party they want woohoo. So
her boy comes over and they are in the bed room woohooing.
Her crush, Lucy, jumps up from the drum set and runs
to go slap her for "cheating". </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Now.
This is where it gets kooky in terms of the way I react
to things. The game is a kind of Rorschach test. I stopped
Lucy from slapping but she wasn't friends with Tillie
anymore. I sent the boys home and had the girls talk.
It took two days but they were friends again but with
no crush. And I was kinda pissed at Tillie for upsetting
Lucy. Lucy kept breaking into tears. I was the one who
clicked on the actions but Tillie was the one who wanted
to party. I blamed her. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Sooooooooo.
I had Lucy's boyfriend come over. Lucy never got amorous
on her own. She just wanted to play and tell jokes.
But I had them woohoo anyway. This time Tillie ran to
do the slapping, which was very confusing because the
crush is gone but somehow made me less angry at Tillie
because now she was crying. They're still making up.
</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Back
in the boy dorm everyone is happy. But Lucy hates Tillie's
boy friend and visa versa. I'm not sure what I'm going
to do about this. I might just leave it be. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
don't really enjoy playing the game as much as I used
to but still like this is why I keep playing. I'm just
always surprised by my reactions. I'm kind of puritanical.
Who knew? </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1443)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1443"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1140" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1140"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1140"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e942"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
29
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
9:12<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e942"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </font></a></span></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The
new television season is full of sea monsters and aliens
and psychics. Oh, my. I usually like stuff like that
but none of it is catching me. I wanted to like the
<a href="http://abc.go.com/primetime/commanderinchief/articles/">first
woman president show</a> but I just didn't. The first
thing she does is to use a show of military might to
help a character based on <a href="http://web.amnesty.org/pages/nga-010902-background-eng">Amina
Lawal</a>. Not realistic and not a good idea. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
still like the West Wing, although it is a shadow of
its former self. I like Gillmore Girls. ER. Numbers.
I'm looking forward to <a href="http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/einstein/">the
Einstein show</a>. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Not
having television to watch is not a bad thing. I just
keep trying to think of something to say about how supernatural
the new season is. It just seems like a response to
something. But I can't quite name it. I am void of course.
And lacking in wit. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">But
it was either this or writing about my celery purchase
realization. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I
needed celery to make tuna salad but I didn't need much.
I thought about buying one of those small containers
of pre cut stuff but it cost for times as much as a
large stalk. Four times as much! Sheesh. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Yep.
Void of course. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1444)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1444"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1141" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1141"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1141"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e943"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">September
30
</font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005
12:57<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
PM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e943"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> </span></font></a></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The
fires in Southern California are now near <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/redzenradish/">Kristina's
home.</a> </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The
world feels so perilous. </span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1445)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1445"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript>
</span></font></font></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1142" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/September2005.htm#e1142"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1142"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">
</font></a></span></p>
<p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"> </p>
</td>
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</td>
</tr>
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