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                    <td width="656"><p><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:14pt;"><b>August 
                        2005</b></span></font></p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1108"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        1 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;11<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:17 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e908"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        enjoyed reading <a href="http://www.ashladle.org/">Maria'</a>s 
                        tales from <a href="http://www.blogher.org/">Bloghercon.</a> 
                        It was unlikely that I would have gone given that it 
                        was costly and I am a social phobe. There may have been 
                        a free event. There should have been. But, again, even 
                        if there had been I have that social phobe thing. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">It's 
                        odd since I spent a serious portion of my life in a 
                        rock-n-roll band, hanging out in bars and clubs, running 
                        a small cafe, working in restaurants, all of which were 
                        highly social. And if you put me in the middle of a room full 
                        of people you would not know I was feeling shy. I can 
                        chat it up with almost anyone. I just prefer one on 
                        one time. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Maria 
                        wrote something that made me smile. A&nbsp;side ways 
                        kinda smile.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <table align="center" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;" border="0" width="320">
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                                <td width="314"><p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-size:9pt;">A few people milling about the lobby. I am drawn to the group closer
to my age, instead of the young things wearing fuzzy bunny-eared-hats
or sporting fierce tattoos. Not that they scare me or that their looks
put me off. It's that they are young and my age is what will put them
off. Even if they could see me, which they probably don't. It's that
seemingly inevitable thing about women of a certain age: the turn
invisible to almost all in the world but themselves. So I head for the
group of women who, at first seem almost as old and almost as lost as I
am. </span></font></p>

                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-size:9pt;">&nbsp;</span></font></p>
<p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-size:9pt;">Turns out, this crowd is to be reckoned with. All of them successful
businesswomen or women with successful books, and most of them from the
East Coast. Wow. Then, there is me, with my rambling blog, my slim book
of poems and no job to speak of...</span></font></p>
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                        </table>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        guess I would hope that in a group of women that age-invisible 
                        thing wouldn't happen but I know it does. And successful 
                        people. What is that? I guess I would hope that in a 
                        group of women the poets would be as valued as the business 
                        types. But ... the whole convention had a corporate 
                        feel to it. Now, the feel I got was from some scant reading 
                        and not as a result of being there so my critique is 
                        from that far away perspective. Having said that, on 
                        the schedule the welcome session included a tabulation 
                        of a survey and &quot;what we challenge you to accomplish&quot;. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Huh? 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Obviously 
                        I'm low on the will to accomplish spectrum but really. 
                        What is that about? Maybe it's a conference thing and 
                        I don't understand. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">And 
                        there is a chicken and an egg thing. Was Maria invisible 
                        to the younger women? Probably not. Here is <a href="http://beth.typepad.com/beths_blog/2005/07/meet_the_bloghe.html">a 
                        lovely picture of Maria</a> taken by a woman who seemed 
                        to have worked hard in support of the event. If I were 
                        in a lobby I would have veered toward the bunny earred 
                        and tattooed. Which may say something about my level 
                        of maturity. Or not. My sense of the whole thing was 
                        that it was a networking frenzy and I should certainly 
                        be more interested in networking. I'm just not. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">What 
                        I learned from what Maria learned was that I am an identity 
                        blogger. It came at no surprise. The personal is political&nbsp;was 
                        a plank of the feminist movement in the sixties. And, 
                        as Maria said much better than I could have...</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <table align="center" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;" border="0" width="309">
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                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-size:9pt;">Of course, somewhere between the strict confines of the ego and the
vast steppes of the political there is a way to loosen those bonds on
the self and also to make the inhospitable and impersonal fields of the
political more personal. Blogging is not the only, nor the first tool
of transformation. Blogging didn't create &quot;identity bloggers.&quot; Those
who blog to make sense of the world through their own senses would do
this in another form, had blogs not come about.
                                    </span></font></td>
                            </tr>
                        </table>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Yep. 
                        Like. <a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0970737084/occamproducti-20/102-0150850-0261729?creative=327641&camp=14573&link_code=as1">Poetry</a>. 
                        And <a href="http://www.fatshadow.com/Avoirdupois.htm">memoir.</a> 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Whenever 
                        one of those - where are all the women blogger - things 
                        pops up I always have the same reaction. They are every 
                        where. Doing lots of things. That question comes from 
                        the expert society. The bastard child of academic life 
                        in which publish or perish establishes credibility and 
                        hierarchy. I don't read the pundit blogs very often. 
                        I don't know who the superstars are but I could guess. 
                        And none of them are very compelling to me. Even when 
                        I agree with their politics. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">When 
                        I first started reading blogs I was most attracted to 
                        the &quot;mommy&quot; blogs. I thought it was a great 
                        way for moms to break out of the isolation that can 
                        occur when you are home with the kids. But why is it 
                        that when women write about their kids they are mommy 
                        blogs and when men write about their kids it's an interesting 
                        post? I like art blogs and literary blogs and knitting 
                        blogs and mostly I like identity blogs. That's where 
                        the real sedition of culture is taking place. I don't 
                        really care which movie star is dating which other movie 
                        star. I care about <a href="http://randomwalks.com/drublood/archives/021749.html">Dru's 
                        sassy new hair cut.</a> I like that I can see the <a href="http://smallhand.blogspot.com/2005_07_01_smallhand_archive.html#112231652562179304">making 
                        of quilt </a>and never hafta do it. I like knowing <a href="http://easybakecoven.net/2005/07/saturday-morning-me-need-xanax.html">what 
                        Susan is wearing on Saturday morning.</a> <a href="http://blueridgeblog.blogs.com/blue_ridge_blog/2005/07/a_good_day.html">And</a> 
                        <a href="http://www.willa.com/moblog/">all</a> <a href="http://octopusgardenhome.blogspot.com/2005/07/nobody-likes-pig-licker.html">those</a> 
                        <a href="http://elayneriggs.blogspot.com/2005/07/friday-cat-blogging-kevin-drum-good.html">pets.</a> 
                        And <a href="http://kuidaosumi.blogspot.com/2005/07/go-jump-in-lake_21.html#comments">babies.</a> 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Was 
                        the central question of the bloghercon about how to 
                        get the perspective of women noticed? Then what is the 
                        perspective of women? Are bloggers journalists? Yes. 
                        And no. Are blogs diaries? Yes. And no. Is blogging 
                        about community? Yes. and no. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"><a href="http://www.jadedju.com/archives/2005/07/more_often_than.php">Jill 
                        posted something</a> that rang for me. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <table align="center" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;" border="0" width="340">
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                                <td width="334">
                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-size:9pt;">More often than not, I can't find that old feeling of enthusiasm for
blogging any more. I recall the days when I viewed my life through the
lens of &quot;will that make for a good blog post?&quot;, and the daily return
drives from work, during which I mentally composed the evening's post.
Now I forget that I even have a weblog a lot of the time, and if I
begin thinking about the way to frame an experience into an entry, I
generally end up determining that it's not worth the trouble.
                                    </span></font></td>
                            </tr>
                        </table>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">But 
                        then she writes about a meet-up with another blogger. 
                        Yeah. I didn't start my blog to meet people but I have 
                        and I have been happy about it. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Maria 
                        says:</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <table align="center" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;" border="0" width="359">
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                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-size:9pt;">I learned that I am an &quot;identity blogger.&quot; My blog has no focus -- or
rather, it's all about me. My blog is only as interesting as my
character is..</span></font>.
                                </td>
                            </tr>
                        </table>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Gulp. 
                        I feel like my blogging has been weak for awhile. I 
                        was in the big depression and it got really bad. I am 
                        feeling much better. And, although some people think 
                        this is a sign of pathology, it is largely due do to 
                        the love and support of my friends. I am still hanging 
                        from a&nbsp;financial cliff. I am still struggling to 
                        write and publish. I am still a moody mid life grrrl. 
                        But I am feeling more grounded and centered and all 
                        those words that don't have much meaning in a corporate 
                        culture value grid. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Sometimes 
                        this is an issue blog. There are <a href="http://www.bigfatblog.com/">two</a> 
                        <a href="http://www.amptoons.com/blog/archives/category/fat-fat-and-more-fat/">other</a> 
                        bloggers who blog the issue. Both MEN! Of course there 
                        are <a href="http://www.redpolka.org/blog/archives/001719.html">women</a> 
                        blogging about fat politics. I was just being pesky. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        want to keep writing and linking but it's time for me 
                        to get ready for the pool. Links are the means of exchange 
                        in the blogging world. Links and comments. And I'm not 
                        great at either. But I try. Blogging for me at this 
                        point is a way to keep pushing myself to write. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        have my own version of sexism in which women don't buy 
                        into that whole make a place where the people who can 
                        afford to go can meet up and build a network. One in 
                        which two women who have a long standing issue can sit 
                        down and at least pay one another the respect of allowing 
                        for the feeling of what happened and not just dismiss 
                        a reaction as unfounded, or unclear. What I love about 
                        blogging is that you can do it for free. And you don't 
                        hafta be a good writer. And you don't even hafta be 
                        interesting. Oddly enough there are birds of your feather 
                        who find you and give you the great gift of reading 
                        what you write. And. That's way more than enough. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1411)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1411"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1109" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1109"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1109"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        2 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;10<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:07 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e909"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Someone 
                        forwarded <a href="http://slate.msn.com/id/2123659/nav/tap1/">this 
                        article</a> to a list serve I read. I've seen the Dove&nbsp;ads 
                        scattered around the city. Perhaps I'm prudish but I 
                        can't get totally happy about any ad in which women 
                        are standing around in their underwear even when it 
                        is basic white underwear. And I always have the same 
                        problem of wondering why women who seem to be a pretty 
                        average size are so controversial. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The 
                        fellow who wrote the article says some sort of nice 
                        things. He confesses to having a crush on one of the 
                        women. He also calls them husky and imperfect. Huh? 
                        He makes the point that the ads are for firming creme, 
                        which seems less that supportive of what women really 
                        look like. He gives the ads a short term grade of A 
                        because everyone is talking about them. Really? Everyone? 
                        But he gives them a long term grade of D because ...</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <table align="center" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;" border="0" width="309">
                            <tr>
                                <td width="303"> 
                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-size:9pt;">Sadly, this is not a winning play for the long haul.
If Dove keeps running ads like this, women will get bored with the
feel-good, politically correct message. Eventually (though perhaps only
subconsciously), they'll come to think of Dove as the brand for fat
girls. Talk about &quot;real beauty&quot; all you want�once you're the brand for
fat girls, you're toast.
                                    </span></font></td>
                            </tr>
                        </table>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Shoop. 
                        There it is.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">There 
                        is a commercial on which Susan Sarandon and another 
                        actress are using age defying make-up. I like Susan 
                        Sarandon. I like her acting and her politics. And every 
                        time I see that ad I want to ask her how she imagines 
                        real change will happen in terms of how older women 
                        are seen when she is promoting the need for age defiance. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Before 
                        I started this I jumped to BFB to see if Paul had blogged 
                        about the ad and <a href="http://www.bigfatblog.com/archives/001674.php">he 
                        had</a>. Wendy can have the last word if you read <a href="http://www.suntimes.com/output/otherviews/cst-nws-dove31.html">this</a> 
                        after you read my post. Heh. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Another 
                        <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/g2/story/0,,1528862,00.html">forwarded 
                        article</a> gave me a little more hope. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The 
                        same divisions exist. Some people are happy to see &quot;normal&quot; 
                        people represented and other people are hateful. There's 
                        a full spectrum of response in between. I think most 
                        people are walking past the ads thinking about what 
                        is going on in their own lives. But these images get 
                        into our brains where they do the work of narrowing 
                        the sense of what a body is supposed to look like and 
                        making us wonder how we measure up. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1412)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1412"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1110" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1110"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1110"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1110"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        3 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;10<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:23 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e910"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">In 
                        a relatively&nbsp;short time I have seen <a href="http://www.netflix.com/MovieDisplay?movieid=60001952&trkid=181026">two</a> 
                        <a href="http://www.netflix.com/MovieDisplay?movieid=60031224&trkid=106866&lnkctr=yadb_returneddvd">movies</a> 
                        in which there was footage, quite a bit of footage, 
                        of turtles. Just turtles. Walking in their slow way. 
                        And so the other day when I looked up and saw a turtle 
                        on a PSA for public power on the TV I began to wonder.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">About 
                        what?</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        don't know. Exactly. Just. What's with all the turtles? 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1413)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1413"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1111" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1111"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1111"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1111"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        5 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;11<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:09 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e911"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">In 
                        my perfect world I would get out of bed, walk out the 
                        door and jump right into a pool. Naked. I have some 
                        experience of this. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">For 
                        a short while I lived in a new age retreat center and 
                        (of course) ran the kitchen. In the very early morning 
                        I would make bread dough and set it to rise while I 
                        took a swim in a pool that was fed by natural hot springs. 
                        (There are <a href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2005/01/30/TRGE7B0DOL1.DTL&o=2">pictures</a> 
                        of <a href="http://www.sierrahotsprings.org/">the place</a>. 
                        It's owned by new new age people now.) Then I put the 
                        bread into bread pans and set them to rise while I soaked 
                        in the hot tub. I was naked a lot. I wore draw string 
                        skirts and t-shirts with a variety of new age slogans 
                        and images and a necklace with an Om sign. The necklace 
                        was the only thing I never took off. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">And, 
                        in case anyone is wondering, I was fat. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Then 
                        the bread went in the oven and&nbsp;I made what ever 
                        else I was going to make for breakfast. People followed 
                        their noses to the table. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The 
                        schedule at <a href="http://www.thd.org/issuesandprojects/poolandplayground.html">the 
                        pool </a>is going to change in the fall. There will 
                        be two mornings when it is open at 6:15. I am SO happy 
                        about this. I will hafta wear a suit but otherwise it's 
                        pretty close to my dream come true. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1414)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1414"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1112" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1112"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1112"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1113"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        6 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;9<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:12 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e913"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        got to have coffee with <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/keryx/">Keryx</a>&nbsp;(who 
                        I have been <a href="http://www.redpolka.org/">reading</a> 
                        for a few years) and <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/missmeridian/">Miss 
                        Meridian</a> (who I have not read). It was very, very 
                        fun. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        do like meeting people who I've been reading. I like 
                        talking to smart women who have lots of stuff to say. 
                        I wanted to attach myself to them for the rest of their 
                        vacation but they were trying to swallow the Bay Area 
                        in one big bite and I knew I couldn't keep up. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">At 
                        some point in the conversation we were talking about 
                        the joys of biscuits. I woke up this morning with a 
                        &nbsp;mad craving. I've made them a zillion times but 
                        not very often just for me. Usually as a part of some 
                        southern themed meal. But this morning I had my hands 
                        in the flour pinching the butter into pea sized chunks. 
                        No buttermilk but they'll be good enough. They are in 
                        the oven even as I type. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1415)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1415"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1113" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1113"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1113"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1114"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        9 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;10<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:43 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e914"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">My 
                        Internet provider was off line all morning yesterday. 
                        This is the &nbsp;second time recently I couldn't go 
                        on line first thing, the first being when the electricity 
                        was off the other day. It's almost shocking how thrown 
                        off I get. I spent some time trying to figure out what 
                        was going on and <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/redzenradish/">Kristina</a> 
                        called. We had to talk about As I Lay Dying, which I 
                        finished over the weekend and needed help to parse. 
                        I will be rereading it now. Then I went swimming and 
                        Miriam took me out to lunch so we could talk about something 
                        she wants me to write for her. By the time I could get 
                        on line I forgot what I was going to post. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">All 
                        weekend I listened to different reports commemorating 
                        the anniversary of the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. 
                        I can't remember if I really did duck and cover or if 
                        I think I did because I've heard about it. I do remember 
                        walking around in our basement imagining how we would 
                        all live there. It was our bomb shelter. The naivete 
                        of all that is almost frightening. But, of course, we 
                        were <a href="http://www.nydailynews.com/news/col/jgonzalez/">not 
                        informed</a> and we didn't read <a href="http://herseyhiroshima.com/">The 
                        New Yorker</a>. We thought we'd just sit in the basement 
                        for awhile and then go on with life as usual. Or maybe 
                        that was just me. As a kid the idea of us all in the 
                        basement seemed like an adventure. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        also remember conversations when I was a teen about 
                        how the knowledge of the bomb created nihilism in the 
                        world view of my generation. I hadn't really thought 
                        about it. I just thought about family survival adventures 
                        in the basement. And. I did not think about the <a href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2005/08/09/MNGF6E53GB1.DTL">people 
                        of Hiroshima and Nagasaki.</a> Not for many years. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1416)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1416"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1114" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1114"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1114"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1115"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        10 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;9<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:26 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e915"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        don't really write about the president other than the 
                        occasional offhanded reference. He's just too horrible. 
                        I reach a shrill level of vitriol internally every time 
                        I think about him. I don't feel too bad about that but 
                        it doesn't seem like I wanna put it out in the world. 
                        But watching <a href="http://www.truthout.org/docs_2005/080805A.shtml">this 
                        thing with Cindy Sheehan</a> unfold I just feel this 
                        very flat contempt. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">It 
                        would take so little. All he has to do is <a href="http://www.meetwithcindy.org/">face 
                        her.</a>&nbsp;There is just something so fundamentally 
                        disrespectful in almost everything this man does. But 
                        this is the problem I have when I try to write a post 
                        about him. I feel like I'm saying the obvious. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        should focus on <a href="http://www.codepinkalert.org/article.php?id=451">Cindy</a>. 
                        Her courage. Her will. Her loss. Her dignity. If I had 
                        the money I would fly down to Texas right now. Just 
                        to stand with her. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1417)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1417"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1115" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1115"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1115"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1116"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        12 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;10<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:29 
                                                    AM</font></font></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e916"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I've 
                        been reading books lately in which there have been words 
                        I don't know. I love when that happens. I marvel at 
                        writers who have such words in their head.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">In 
                        something I read there was the word unassailable. I 
                        did know what that meant but I'm sure I've never used 
                        it in a sentence. It stuck in my head yesterday, which 
                        gives me some hope that I may some day use it in a sentence. 
                        (Other than a sentence about not using it.) I kept wondering 
                        who is unassailable. People have taken shots at Gandhi 
                        and Mother Teresa. I may have read the word in one of 
                        things I linked about Cindy. Who I just heard <a href="http://www.democracynow.org/article.pl?sid=05/08/12/1422248">on 
                        Democracy Now</a> this morning. Smart. Strong. <a href="http://www.truthout.org/docs_2005/081205I.shtml">So 
                        cool!</a> And I would say it is a perfect word for her. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I, 
                        on the other hand, am clearly assailable. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Heh. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1418)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1418"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1116" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1116"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1116"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1117"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        16 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;12<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:16 
                                                    PM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e917"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Well. 
                        It's a weird thing having my own personal troll. It 
                        is kinda getting to me. Not in a big way. But it's making 
                        it a little hard to post. When <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/keryx/">April</a> 
                        was here she said 
                        something about the way I write my life on-line. Not 
                        as a criticism. We were just talking about the different 
                        forms writing takes in Live Journal, or Blogger, or 
                        what ever. I hadn't really thought about my writing 
                        as being so, so personal. There is a lot that goes on 
                        in my life that I don't write. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">In 
                        <a href="http://www.booksite.com/texis/scripts/oop/click_ord/showdetail.html?sid=3471&isbn=140007665X&music=&buyable=0&assoc_id=&spring=">the 
                        book</a> I've been reading, one of the characters says 
                        that disinterest is the opposite of love. That feels 
                        right. So when someone who says they work sixty hours 
                        a week to get by makes the time to read me knowing that 
                        they won't like what I have to say, or the way that 
                        I say it, and makes more time to leave me a fairly long 
                        all over the place comment, it's not about love and 
                        it's not about indifference. Is it about hate? Maybe. 
                        But it's not about hating me. It's about hating an idea 
                        of who I am. So it would seem easy enough for me to 
                        ignore. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I've 
                        read people on line who I didn't like. Sometimes I end 
                        up back at their site because someone I do know links 
                        to them. It doesn't occur to me to leave a comment telling 
                        the person how dopey I think they are. I might argue 
                        an idea but I try to be respectful. And I always use 
                        my own name. (Fake names. Yet another reason to ignore 
                        dumb comments.) There is a part of me that wants to 
                        understand what makes another person do stuff like that. 
                        I know from experience that I can't have a reasonable 
                        conversation with my little troll. I tried. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">It's 
                        interesting. Sort of.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">There 
                        is only one thing that ever made me feel like a victim 
                        and I never write about it. I know too well how much 
                        work it is to keep it from taking up central residency 
                        in my sense of self. I was hit by a truck once and I 
                        guess I was a victim then but I don't feel it that way. 
                        There is a difference between identifying as a victim 
                        and understanding yourself to be a member of a group 
                        that experiences oppression. I am a woman. I am fat. 
                        And I am middle aged. I understand oppression. And even 
                        in all of that I don't feel like a victim. I feel like 
                        a person on a path less traveled. Or a path of resistance. 
                        Or a path that leads to a dead end. Or not. It's just 
                        my life. Talking about the oppression isn't complaining. 
                        In a world full of snappy narratives in which it all 
                        works out and in which it all working out is measured 
                        in terms of product, my life may never measure up. On 
                        a path where value is measured in terms of human exchange 
                        and expanding view, my life is rich. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">It 
                        might be nice if seventy percent of my posts were about 
                        food but I challenge anyone to do the math on that. 
                        I don't think I have ever written about a pear coz I 
                        don't love pears that much. I do love peaches. I'm sure 
                        I have written about peaches. I am obsessed with peaches 
                        in the summer. I have one in my yoghurt almost every 
                        day. The season is winding down and my obsession is 
                        shifting to tomatoes. Tomato and feta salad. SO good. 
                        If I were a thin, or average sized&nbsp;person it would 
                        just be a post about something I ate. Apparently, for 
                        some people, my thoughts about food prove that I am 
                        obsessed with food. OK. Guilty. I love food. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Obsession 
                        can be problematic. I know fat people who are obsessed 
                        with food. In fact one of my concerns with the fat revolution 
                        is that in our effort to show that not ALL fat people 
                        are obsessed with food we exclude the people who are 
                        struggling with compulsion. One peach in my yogurt probably 
                        won't hurt me but I know fat people who struggle with 
                        food issues. None of them have ever been served by focusing 
                        on their size.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">So 
                        this is all a response to a dumb comment. I get so many 
                        more positive comments. It's just nuts to put any energy 
                        into responding to a comment that reflects such an unwillingness 
                        to see me. But I haven't been able to think about the 
                        blog and not think about the comment. I thought maybe 
                        writing about it might help me to shake it off. We'll 
                        see. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        don't really need encouragement. I do know that there 
                        are people who read me because they like what I'm writing 
                        and/or how I write. I am grateful. I want to be able 
                        to keep writing on my blog. It keeps me from caving 
                        inward. I'm just shaking off some drudge. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1419)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1419"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1117" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1117"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1117"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1118"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        17 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;10<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:02 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e918"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        woke up from a dream about my first roommate. I was 
                        crossing a street and she was crossing from the other 
                        side. She had a baby in one a snuggly on her chest. 
                        It took me a minute to recognize her. The baby was so 
                        beautiful. We went back to her house to talk. It was 
                        a warm, loving dream and I didn't want to wake up but 
                        there's some construction going on in my hood so sleeping 
                        isn't easy. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">That's 
                        always such a strange feeling. Finding someone in your 
                        dream and wanting to stay with them. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I've 
                        been doing little writing jobs. I like the work because 
                        I have no investment in the writing other than it be 
                        good. I have no personal need driving the language. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"><a href="http://www.helanderdance.org/">Danelle</a> 
                        is using some sections from my book in her new piece. 
                        And I did some new writing for it. That has been terrifically 
                        fun. One of her board members put me on the payroll. 
                        It's a bit of a joke because it's a small non profit 
                        dance company. There is no real payroll. But I am going 
                        to get a little&nbsp;cash.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        have been reconnecting to old friends lately. Danelle, 
                        Jeane's visit, Jane is coming at the end of the month, 
                        Jo Ann sent me a copy of <a href="http://www.spdbooks.org/Details.asp?BookID=0971680027">her 
                        book</a>, in which I am acknowledged. Quite a thrill! 
                        And Bobbie showed up in my dream. It feels like a gathering 
                        up of something. Something old and new at the same time. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1420)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1420"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1118" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1118"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1118"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e111"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        18 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;9<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:54 
                                                    AM</font></font></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e919"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        had just gotten into bed with my book when I heard a 
                        a young man on the hill in front of my apartment sing 
                        DON'T LET ME DOWN at the top of his lungs. He sang it 
                        the requisite four times as he moved down the hill, 
                        passed my apartment, so it had a slow Doppler quality. 
                        I don't know if he sang the rest of the song.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        love stuff like that. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1421)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1421"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1119" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1119"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1119"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e112"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        19 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;11<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:11 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e920"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">One 
                        of the restaurants I worked in had an open kitchen. People 
                        were dining a few feet in front of us. One day my friend 
                        Allison and I were cooking and some young women at a 
                        table were smiling at us. As they got up to leave one 
                        of them came to the counter and said, &quot;It's nice 
                        to see women in the kitchen.&quot; </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Hmmm. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Now 
                        we knew she meant the professional kitchen but still. 
                        It was a moment of cognitive dissonance. I remembered 
                        it the other day when news of the <a href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2005/08/14/national/w081440D11.DTL&hw=whitehouse+chef&sn=001&sc=1000">new 
                        chef</a> came out and I thought of it again when I was 
                        reading through <a href="http://www.ashladle.org/archives/000645.html#000645">Maria's</a> 
                        <a href="http://www.ashladle.org/archives/000646.html#000646">posts</a> 
                        about the dust up over <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2005/TECH/internet/08/10/mena.trott/">Mena's 
                        CNN interview.</a> </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        agree with Maria when she says:</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <table align="center" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;" border="0" width="370">
                            <tr>
                                <td width="364">
                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-size:9pt;">By looking at this interview in its full text and context, couldn't one
also make the case that Mena is telling knitters who blog that what
they are doing is blogging and that they are just much part of that
technological revolution as are the &quot;men&quot; whose voices drown them out
in the media ... but not in the middle of their own lives, where
speaking matters and technology is just a tool.</span></font>
                                </td>
                            </tr>
                        </table>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Perhaps 
                        because I've thought about knitting blogs when the oh 
                        so reductive where-are-all-the-women bloggers question 
                        gets asked. And I'm sort of amazed that women being 
                        associated with &quot;traditional&quot; women's activities 
                        like knitting and motherhood is a lesser&nbsp;thing. 
                        Why is being a political pundit or a technology maven 
                        better? Maria addresses all these things with great 
                        eloquence and verve.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        don't like conversations </span></font>a<font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">bout 
                        gender in boy/girl terms. Because they&nbsp;ignore the 
                        third sex and polarize. And I resent the woman bloggers 
                        who don't often link other women and talk about women 
                        being marginalized. What they are really saying is that 
                        women are marginalized in technology and politics. And 
                        that's true. I support them in their battle for more 
                        voice but they don't define the world of women on the 
                        web. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The 
                        most offensive thing in the CNN piece to me was the 
                        opening paragraph. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <table align="center" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;" border="0" width="360">
                            <tr>
                                <td width="354">
                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-size:9pt;">Mena Trott's personal Web log isn't exactly
the stuff of headlines. She writes mostly about her daily life -- what
she did over the weekend, what's she's reading, what she ate for
dinner. Chances are, if she weren't the co-founder of a successful Web
log publishing company (Six Apart), her Web log probably wouldn't get
much press.
                                    </span></font></td>
                            </tr>
                        </table>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">That 
                        characterizes what attracted me to blogging so why isn't 
                        it the stuff of headlines? I think blogging subverts 
                        the famous and expert culture. I'm way more interested 
                        in the lives of bloggers than I am in the lives of people 
                        who make movies. Using a blog as a platform for ascension 
                        into the ranks of the called upon for opinion is only 
                        one part of what goes on. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">But 
                        it's really the way sexism gets talked about that bugs 
                        me. Because the complaints come from the values established 
                        in a sexist culture. There are these funny moment when 
                        a women in the kitchen is an act of revolution. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1422)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1422"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1120" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1120"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1120"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e922"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        22 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;10<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:22 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e922"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">When 
                        we were in India Jeane turned me onto the use of hankies. 
                        It's funny to say that since my grandmother used one. 
                        But it was Jeane who talked about how great it was to 
                        have something that you could wash and reuse and suddenly 
                        it made sense. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        was reminded of this on Saturday when I was watching 
                        <a href="http://www.booktv.org/indepth/index.asp?segid=5478&schedID=335">Helen 
                        Caldicott on Book TV</a>. She pulled out her cloth hankie 
                        (Actually it was a big orange piece of cloth. Somehow 
                        more than a hankie.) and talked about the need to reduce 
                        things. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">It's 
                        something I think about a lot when I watch commercials 
                        for use and toss everything. Clean your toilet bowl 
                        with this and flush it. Cut your chicken on this and 
                        toss it. Quicker picker uppers. And the land fill builds. 
                        I saw something about a woman who runs her family restaurant. 
                        There are these things you can put in pots to cook soup 
                        with and then you pull them out, pour out the soup and 
                        you can toss them. They looked like plastic bags but 
                        I guess they're some kind of new something. She thought 
                        they were great because her dishwashers weren't scrubbing 
                        pots. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        have cloth towel in the kitchen and a cloth napkin. 
                        And I also have paper towels. I probably use more paper 
                        towels than I should. I only buy Kleenex when I have 
                        a really bad cold but that doesn't happen often. I do 
                        use toilet paper to blow my nose now and then.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        have a stack of hankies. Some were my grandmom's. Some 
                        my mom's. I haven't wanted to use them because they 
                        are keepsakes. But after listening to Helen I pulled 
                        one out. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1423)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1423"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1121" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1121"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1121"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e923"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        23 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;10<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:25 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e923"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Karen 
                        has started a <a href="http://www.goyourway.net/">new 
                        business</a> the main product of which is the <a href="http://www.goyourway.net/p-mate.html">P-Mate</a>. 
                        If you are a woman&nbsp;who goes camping, or to out 
                        door festivals, a&nbsp;P-Mate could come in handy. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        haven't done much camping. But when I first moved to 
                        NYC I lived in a residential hotel. The bathroom was 
                        so dirty that I often waited until I got to Grand Central 
                        before I used the bathroom. I might have used a P-Mate&nbsp;then. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">This 
                        is a family business. So there's also a page for <a href="http://www.goyourway.net/otherproducts.html">Mark's 
                        music.</a> I just love it!!</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1424)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1424"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1122" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1122"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1122"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e925"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        25 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;12<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:09 
                                                    PM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e925"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        have a stack of bookmarks. They come from Amazon, most 
                        book stores, some decorative ones. I'm always trying 
                        to put them somewhere easy to find and I can never find 
                        them when I need one. Right now they are in the corner 
                        of a&nbsp;shelf above my desk. Easy arm reach. And yet. 
                        I couldn't find them. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        needed one because <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/redzenradish/">Kristina</a> 
                        sent me a couple books and I started reading <a href="http://staceys.booksense.com/NASApp/store/Product;jsessionid=aaeNZMp7fRZc?s=showproduct&isbn=0767915658">one</a> 
                        right away. I just finished <i>Light In August</i>, 
                        which I decided to read after I read <i>As I Lay Dying,</i> 
                        which I read because <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/redzenradish/80395.html?mode=reply">Kristina 
                        read it</a> and needed someone to talk to about it and 
                        yes, it was somewhat because Oprah has them up for summer 
                        reading but it doesn't take much for us to read a book. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">There's 
                        this clip of Oprah pitching the book club in which shows 
                        the three Faulkner's in their new box set and says in 
                        her most ebullient voice, &quot;It's gonna be FUN!!&quot; 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Fun? 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Reading 
                        Faulkner? </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Uh. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Sometimes, 
                        when I was reading I was in a swoon. The language. The 
                        depth of the characters. The plot inside a plot inside 
                        a plot. Sometimes I get frustrated and want him to get 
                        on with it. Just tell me what happens!!! But more than 
                        either of those reactions the racism is hard to take. 
                        I get that he was writing about a time and place. I 
                        get that. It's just hard to take. It's not even close 
                        to fun. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">My 
                        Faulkner is in <a href="http://www.loa.org/volume.jsp?RequestID=42">a 
                        volume from LOA</a>. They always have these burgundy 
                        cloth&nbsp;bookmarks attached. So I didn't need one 
                        for that. I have one in the <a href="http://staceys.booksense.com/NASApp/store/Product;jsessionid=a77owOWyF0w5?s=showproduct&isbn=0609600931">Leonard</a>,which 
                        I'm still reading. I started reading before I looked 
                        for them and, despite the fact that they're in a pretty 
                        obvious place, it took me awhile to find them.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The 
                        <a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0451525698/thesherwoodander/102-2872669-3996967">other 
                        book</a> she sent is by a man who is credited with inspiring 
                        Faulkner. It's good that I know where the bookmarks 
                        are. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1425)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1425"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1123" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1123"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1123"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e926"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        26 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;11<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:32 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e926"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item">&nbsp;</span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        really enjoyed <i><a href="http://staceys.booksense.com/NASApp/store/Product;jsessionid=aaeNZMp7fRZc?s=showproduct&isbn=0767915658">Knitting 
                        Heaven and Earth.</a> </i>It was like having a conversation 
                        with a friends. Lots of shared experience and cultural 
                        reference. She writes, in part,&nbsp;about knitting 
                        while her father was dying. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><i>&nbsp;</i></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        learned to crochet while I was in the hospital but after 
                        about four afghans I stopped in the middle of one. I 
                        picked it up when my dad was dying. There was something 
                        comforting about the feel of yarn moving though my fingers. 
                        Maybe I should have worked on being better at crochet 
                        but I wanted to learn how to knit. I can't do much. 
                        I just knit row after row. And I've been content to 
                        that. I know I need to take the next step. Maybe even 
                        try to follow a pattern. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><i>&nbsp;</i></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">She 
                        writes about an unexpected and failed romance, the passing 
                        of friends, her relationship with her godson, having 
                        breast cancer. Toward the end of the book I sensed that 
                        she was still working to understand something. She writes 
                        about writing. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><i>&nbsp;</i></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">She 
                        mentions lots of knitting and yarn resources so I found 
                        my self at the computer more than a few times looking 
                        for people. She mentions <a href="http://www.kaffefassett.com/">this 
                        guy.</a> Looking around his site I was reminded of something 
                        I read in <a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0819562009/ref%3Dpd%5Fsl%5Faw%5Falx-jeb-9-1%5Fbook%5F5267390%5F3/102-2872669-3996967">a 
                        book</a> by <a href="http://www.mcrichardsfilms.com/">M.C.Richards</a> years ago. She thought everyone should 
                        make their own <a href="http://www.potluckstudios.com/Entrantz/kaffe_dinnerware.html">dish 
                        ware</a> 
                        and <a href="http://www.pineconehill.com/retail_kaffe.html">sheets</a> 
                        and <a href="http://www.kaffefassett.com/knitting.htm">clothes</a>. 
                        He does. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><i>&nbsp;</i></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I'm 
                        never gonna be a big crafter. I don't think. But I like 
                        having something that I'm working on. Cooking was my 
                        craft. Still is. I just don't do it as much. And writing. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">She 
                        struggled with a heath decision in the book. As have 
                        I been. And she&nbsp;struggled in much the same way. 
                        The weird thing about a book like this is that you feel 
                        like you've gotten to know someone but of course, you 
                        haven't. If I saw her somewhere I would want to talk. 
                        But there would be this odd feeling of knowing her when 
                        I don't really. I dunno. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1426)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1426"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1124" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1124"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1124"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e927"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        27 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;9<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:57 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e927"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        wasn't going to write about <a href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2005/08/24/national/a062847D71.DTL&hw=Dr+Terry+Bennett&sn=001&sc=1000">the 
                        doctor who told the woman to lose weight.</a> <a href="http://www.bigfatblog.com/archives/001698.php">Paul 
                        blogged it</a>. <a href="http://www.amptoons.com/blog/archives/2005/08/25/youre-fat-and-wont-get-layed-acceptible-medical-commentary/">Kim 
                        blogged it.</a> <a href="http://fattypatties.blogspot.com/2005_08_01_fattypatties_archive.html#112509316400362132">Pattie 
                        Blogged it</a>. I'm sure others have blogged it. I'm 
                        proud of the woman for filing the complaint and I'm 
                        thrilled that the New Hampshire Board of Medicine took 
                        her complaint seriously. That's all I should need to 
                        say. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Of 
                        course I do feel the need to marvel about him saying 
                        she would outlive her spouse and not be able to find 
                        a new relationship because men don't like fat women. 
                        Since she is married we can assume one man liked her. 
                        And if the doctor is so sure she'll out live her husband 
                        then he must think she's pretty healthy. Why does he 
                        assume that she would want to meet anyone else? Maybe 
                        she would enjoy having some solitude.&nbsp;Is being 
                        in a partnership now on the list of things a person 
                        needs to be healthy? And maybe if she couldn't find 
                        a man she could find a woman. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">And 
                        I really wonder if people think a fat person needs a 
                        doctor to tell them that they are fat. I'm just gonna 
                        bet that the woman knew she was fat and took offense 
                        at the WAY the doctor lectured her. I would never have 
                        an issue with a doctor talking to me about food and 
                        exercise. Of course, a doctor just apologized to me 
                        for his Dorito breathe while examining&nbsp;my eyes. 
                        Some time later in our conversation he said he had a 
                        very rigid diet and had lost a bunch of weight. I didn't 
                        know Doritos for breakfast was part of a healthy diet. 
                        But it's his business. He gets to eat Doritos. I wouldn't. 
                        I don't like them. But he can. I wouldn't even mind 
                        if a doctor mentioned my weight as part of a list of 
                        risk factors. But that's not what this guy did. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Clearly, 
                        I can go on and on. I wasn't going to but yesterday 
                        I was listening to Eugene Robinson on CSPAN talking 
                        about <a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/08/11/AR2005081101759.html">a 
                        column he wrote</a> about the obsessive reporting of 
                        missing white women. During the show he was taking call-in 
                        questions and one woman said something about being over 
                        weight and sure that no one would look for her if she 
                        went missing. Mr. Robinson and Mr. Lamb both had a look 
                        of bemusement. Not in a crude way but as if to agree. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        was overcome with a feeling of deep sadness.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The 
                        issue with what the doctor said was not that he told 
                        a patient that they were engaged in a behavior that 
                        might ultimately cause their demise (like eating junk 
                        food for breakfast) but that he told her weight made 
                        her unlovable. In what world is that about health? And 
                        it contributes to a culture of fat hatred in which a 
                        fat woman imagines that if she went missing no one would 
                        bother to look for her. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">So. 
                        For that woman. I write this post. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1427)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1427"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1125" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1125"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1125"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e928"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        29 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;10<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:55 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e928"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item">&nbsp;</span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"><a href="http://www.mattgonzalez.com/">Matt</a> 
                        was guest hosting <a href="http://sundaysalon.org/">Sunday 
                        Salon</a> yesterday. He interviewed a couple people about 
                        <a href="http://www.burningman.com/">Burning Man.</a> 
                        It was interesting. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The 
                        conversation became one about race after a few callers 
                        said they didn't feel Burning Man was an event that 
                        connected to people of color. The guests and a few other 
                        callers were extremely defensive about that idea. They 
                        think they have a utopia of sorts. It just &nbsp;annoys 
                        me when white people deny racism. The callers were 
                        speaking from their truth. Instead of talking about 
                        how the event could move toward some inclusion the guest 
                        went into denial. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        have a mild interest in going. Very mild. There was 
                        a guy getting his car ready a few blocks from me one 
                        year. He was painting and then adding glitter. It was 
                        SO cool!</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">But. 
                        I'm not really a camp in the desert kinda grrrl. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        used to love to dream about utopia and communities. 
                        But it can be so insular. I need the grist of life in 
                        a city. Burning Man seems like an art project/party. 
                        Cool enough. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1428)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1428"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1126" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1126"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1126"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p><span class="rss:item"><a id="e929"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        30 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;9<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:48 
                                                    AM</font></font></span><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e929"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">This 
                        is from an e-mail I sent to Erica in response to her 
                        comment on <a href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1126">yesterdays 
                        post</a>. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Thank 
                        you for stopping by. It's doubtful that I would ever 
                        send a member <a href="http://www.largefriends.com/my_account?usr_id=0&tid=&rid=&friend_of=&iid=&to_url=">your 
                        way</a>. Not because I don't support your work. Helping 
                        people find one another is a good thing. There are a 
                        number of on (and off) line dating services. If they 
                        work for people then I'm happy for them. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        have some issues with the idea of someone wanting to 
                        be with me because I am fat. It's always seemed like 
                        the opposite of someone not wanting to be with me because 
                        I am fat. I understand that people have physical preferences 
                        and that preferences aren't always the only reason people 
                        connect romantically. I tend to like men with long hair 
                        but that didn't stop me from falling for a balding man. 
                        Still, a preference for fat people in terms of romance 
                        is as valid as any other. I just always hope that love 
                        is the arbiter of beauty. But love may be hypnotized 
                        by popular culture in which fat people have little representation. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        have some issue with the commercialization of romance. 
                        I know that creating and maintaining a site can be costly 
                        but I also know that the web is a place where people 
                        can connect with members of affinity groups for no cost. 
                        It hurts&nbsp;me to imagine how many hopeful fat people 
                        pay money in hopes of finding true love. I know thin 
                        and average sized people have their own clubs and I 
                        feel the same sadness for them. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">And 
                        yet, the market exists. It is a service. So, good luck 
                        with your project. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1429)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1429"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1127" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1127"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1127"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e930"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">August 
                         
                        31 
                                                </font></a><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">2005 
                                                &nbsp;9<font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">:12 
                                                    AM</font></font></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;"> </span></font><span class="rss:item"><a id="e930"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</font></a></span></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        have friends who have been living at Magazine and First 
                        who kindly sent me e-mail to let me know that they had 
                        left the city before the storm hit. The day the storm 
                        hit I had the news on most of the day. It felt like 
                        things might not have been too bad. The next day it 
                        was obvious that things were terrible and getting worse. 
                        </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">My 
                        cable line up puts a bunch of news stations in a row. 
                        They each have a slightly different feel. But for those 
                        two days they all felt the same. Even news people who 
                        I can't bear to watch were compelling because they were 
                        obviously as overwhelmed as everyone else. By yesterday 
                        the lines began to be drawn again. I heard too much 
                        talk about how the people who had insurance were more 
                        responsible than the people who didn't and people who 
                        left the city were smarter. As if everything is always 
                        a matter of choice. It's just not that simple. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">The 
                        first reporting about looting I saw was looting at a 
                        Winn Dixie. I just couldn't feel too bad about people 
                        getting food. The second report was a kid being hauled 
                        out of an electronic store. And, again, when you live 
                        in a culture that bangs in the idea that having all 
                        this STUFF is what makes life happy then you can't be 
                        too surprised when people with no hope of having that 
                        STUFF take their opportunities when they see them. I'm 
                        not defending looting. I just think it's important to 
                        remember the context in which these things take place. 
                        And then this morning I heard about a man who was shooting 
                        at people in defense of his property. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">It's 
                        all so sad. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">My 
                        friends are young. They doubt that they will have jobs. 
                        They aren't sure if the grad program one of them was 
                        in at Tulane will be happening. But they have family 
                        and resources and time. Which isn't to minimize the 
                        disruption of their lives. But I saw so many people 
                        who clearly had not much&nbsp;before this happened and 
                        now they have nothing. </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">I 
                        found a <a href="http://www.deadlykatrina.com/">few</a> 
                        <a href="http://dancingwithkatrina.blogspot.com/">interesting</a> 
                        links from <a href="http://blueridgeblog.blogs.com/">Marie</a> 
                        and <a href="http://easybakecoven.net/">Susan</a> who 
                        are also feeling a bit of the storm. I'm keeping a candle 
                        lit.</span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">10:44 
                        AM </span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Thought 
                        provoking (as always) <a href="http://www.metafilter.com/mefi/44689">link 
                        </a>from <a href="http://www.ncf.carleton.ca/~ek867/wood_s_lot.html">Wood_s 
                        Lot</a></span></font></p>
                        <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
                                                    <p align="justify" style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"><SCRIPT type="text/javascript">get_comment_link(1430)</script> <noscript></span></font><a href="http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentsn/b=90000008560_and_e_is_1430"><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;">comment</span></font></a><font face="Lucida Sans"><span style="font-size:10pt;"></noscript> 
                        </span></font></font></p>
                                                    <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;"><span class="rss:item"><a id="e1128" href="http://www.fatshadow.com/August2005.htm#e1128"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1">Permalink</font></a><a id="e1128"><font face="Lucida Sans" size="1"> 
                                     
                                     </font></a></span></p>
                        <p style="line-height:100%; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:0;">&nbsp;</p>
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